I often find myself complaining about social media. I hate the stigma, the pressure, and false sense of perfection.. I almost always say I want to delete everything. But then without SM, there would not be a way for me to connect with other women who are in the exact same position as myself. Those are the women that make me feel like I am not totally alone (or psycho) in this baseball world. There is an amazing little community of us baseball wives, and without SM, I would never be able to connect, relate, or inspire other women who walk in these same shoes (cleats?) People can laugh all they want at the amazing sites for WAGs to unite & share stories… but they clearly just do not have the slightest idea of what the real baseball life is like and how much support those groups bring.
Perfect example: through social media I have been blessed enough to connect with hundreds of fellow baseball girlfriends & wives. One of them being The Baseball Gypsy as I referred to her before learning who she really is, Korrin Torres. She is so so so soo much more than just a baseball gypsy- she is a strong believer, a fearless fan, and a beautiful woman who is living this crazy baseball life that intrigues so many people. Read our Q&A to get an insight of this “perfect world” we wives live and learn a little more about her gypsy life! Also check out her YouTube channel where she shares life updates.
What’s your favorite thing about the season?
Is it cheesy to say being with Nick? From being in a long distance relationship for almost 5 years to now not having to do the horrible goodbyes and the months apart it’s easy to say that my favorite part of season is being together. I love baseball and I love watching him do what he loves but there is nothing I love more than being with my little family. I don’t take little moments for granted because of how much I missed those things when we were doing distance during season. I have also enjoyed meeting so many people. We have been so fortunate to have people that look out for us and have become our family while we are so far away from home. I look forward to seeing all of my friends at the field every night. From the ushers, to other wives and even fans that come to the game often it has been so fun meeting everyone and hearing their stories.
How does traveling with your husband full time compare to what you experienced over the past 4 years?
It’s definitely different. Before it was just me for most of the year and now I have a little family to take care of every day. I have a lot of busy work that I didn’t have before that takes up a good portion of my day and then there are a lot of nights I spend 4-5 hours at the ballpark. The one thing that is similar is how busy I still am. When I worked at Fox Sports there were days I has working 12+ hours. Just like the guys, I had a baseball schedule which left me with hardly any days off. Now I get up in the early morning to work before Nick is awake and I’m not going to bed until sometimes 1am. I will say our relationship has been much easier. Long distance is tough, even for the strongest of relationships. Nick and I learned quickly that whenever we started to bicker at each other it was usually because the root of the problem was that we were missing each other. Being together now we don’t have to worry about that. We still have time to miss each other when he goes on the road or when he’s gone for most of the day at the field; but being able to wake up together for the majority of our mornings has been such a blessing. Being apart for 2 months at a time was miserable. I missed Nick and I hated feeling like we were living two different lives instead of one for most of the year. We tried our best to get through the difficult times of being apart and I’m proud of the things we have overcome.
How do you fight that feeling of “am I doing enough?” while not working during season?
That feeling didn’t last long to be honest. I was really nervous when I quit my job and first started this journey because I worried I would feel inadequate. Once I jumped into this baseball life I realized there wasn’t going to be a lot of down time. I spend a lot of time each day planning out the future of The Baseball Gypsy. People don’t realize how much time goes into managing social media, filming, editing, trying to post with purpose and responding to the people that are supporting you all while trying to figure out what the future looks like. I think that in itself has been a full-time job for me because I am also self-teaching through so much of it. The editing style is completely different from what I was doing at Fox Sports and I knew very little about Social Media/ Marketing when I started. I spend at least a few hours of my day trying to learn something that could potentially help me in some way. One of my priorities was if I could find a job that fit into what I was doing without having to buy in or sell anything I wanted to take that on as well. I was introduced to a company called VIPKID and it has been such a blessing. I teach English to children in China either super late at night or early in the morning (I usually get up around 4am). I don’t have to leave the house and I can knock out all my classes while Nick and the puppy are sleeping. Between my teaching job, The Baseball Gypsy, and how much time I spend at the field supporting my husband; it doesn’t leave a ton of time to cook, clean, get the dog exercise, travel, pack, unpack, laundry and catch up on anything else that needs to be done before the day is over. I have learned first-hand that success is whatever you want it to be. You have to be proud of yourself whether you are a stay at home Mom or you are the CEO of a company because let’s be honest, both of these women are kicking butt and taking names with what they accomplish in a day. I always get a good laugh when people ask me what I do with all my free time now that I’m traveling with Nick. I have also learned that I don’t have to prove myself to anyone. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again what you DO doesn’t define you. Whatever “enough” is for you and for your marriage is different for everyone and it is constantly changing. There have been times I’ve been the bread winner and times Nick has been the bread winner but our love for one another has never changed. Love is Nick assuring me I’m enough even on the days I decide to watch Netflix all day and show up in the 5th inning. I think the easiest way to fight this feeling is being with someone that fights it for you as well as knowing that life will bring slow days and extremely busy days but both should be enjoyed.
What’s one thing you want people to understand about us baseball gypsies?
There are so many things. These are some of the strongest women I have ever met in my life. These women choose being alone most of the year because they have fallen in love with a man that plays baseball for a living. I know first-hand this is so extremely hard yet it is sometimes the only option. I’ve seen my friends spend almost an entire pregnancy away from their man to only have him home for a few days for the birth before having to return to season. I have seen these women pack up and move all over the country alone, some with children and animals, just to be together. I have had people judge me for being a baseball wife and I know other women get the same. I wish people would get to know us. A lot of individuals believe what they see on TV and have such misconceptions about our lives. The women I am lucky enough to call my friends in this baseball life are brave, they are kind and they are deserving of all the happiness in the world.
What have you learned so far on this journey that you wish someone had told you before it all started?
There’s two things. The first is that it will be OK. It’s hard and it’s scary, but God is good and he will provide. I worried myself sick about things that were beyond my control and looking back I wish I would have had more faith. Yes, there will be bumps and for some there will even be earthquakes that will feel like your world is crumbling around you. You will be OK. The sports world has a way of making you feel on top of the world one minute and questioning everything the next. Hold tight to what is constant! Deuteronomy 31:6 says, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
The other thing is important, and something I unfortunately took a long time to learn. I had this idea of what a baseball wife should be, and the further along we got into this thing the more pressure I felt to try to fulfill this make-believe role. I felt like I had to have it all together and needed to portray the same perfection in my relationship. It makes me sad to think about how much time I wasted feeling like I needed to wear a mask because who I was might not be good enough. You do not have to conform to society’s idea of what an athlete’s wife or girlfriend should be. I have found so much relief in loving myself and my relationship just the way it is. I stopped listening to all of the things telling me that I needed to be a perfect spouse with the perfect relationship. I am imperfect, my relationship is imperfect, but I married a good man and we serve a big God who tells us imperfection is OK! I want women to know they are enough, no matter what the world says. I want people to want to get to know me because they know I’m just as imperfect as everyone else. I want people to remember me because of my heart and not because they think my life is (what the kids are calling) “goals”. I will never forget someone I admire dearly said, “have the COURAGE to be the beautiful mess God made you to be.”
Gotta ask… whats your favorite ballpark?!
My favorite MILB ballpark is definitely Frisco. It’s the equivalent of Disneyland in the baseball world. They have a lazy river, incredible food and the ballpark is stunning. I’m easy to please as long as there is good food and good memories so I do have a lot of ballparks I have enjoyed other than Frisco. One of the other things I have enjoyed so much going to so many different parks is meeting the people and the women. I love meeting fans that come to every game or the families that come to visit the players. The Wolff stadium (where Nick plays now) will always hold a special place in my heart. I have so many special memories there and the people I have the pleasure of spending so much time with have become more like family. They have looked after Nick and I which has made this place feel like home. I will forever be thankful for our journey traveling together started at this ballpark. There isn’t anything fancy about The Wolff. There is wear and tear everywhere you look, in all the best ways. I know the employees by name and they root for my husband every game. This stadium has provided security, friendship, and one of the best chapters in my life thus far.